A Fic Gone Bad
by JGrimshaw
Summary: The characters of Kingdom Hearts hijack a seemingly innocent fic...


Disclaimer: ...I don't own Kingdom Hearts. But, really, I do! See, *holds box up* lookie me boxxxxxxxxx!  
  
Dingo: Shut the !@*#&^%$ up!  
  
Me: Stop swearing!  
  
Dingo: Neener. No!  
  
Riku: Blah blah blah. Both of you shut up, we're hijacking this fanfic!  
  
Sora: *Ties us to a chair*  
  
Me: *Eye twitches* Can't...reach...keyboard!  
  
Riku: And don't bother calling for help, no one can hear you!  
  
Dingo: *chews on ropes*  
  
------------------------------------  
  
Riku: You know, I am actually not in love with Sora.  
  
Sora: *on cellphone* Whaddaya mean, I have another fanfic in half an hour?! I'm busy!   
  
Riku: ...Sora?  
  
Sora: Shut up and leave me alone.  
  
Riku: Grr... *tackles Sora*  
  
Passing Fangirls: Haha! We knew it! Look, they're making out!  
  
Sora: Ewwwww...thanks, Riku.  
  
Riku: Bah. Shut up.  
  
Ansem: It is I, Ansem, the ruler of Darkness!  
  
Riku: What?!  
  
Sora: We're going to interview him.  
  
Riku: Why?  
  
Sora: Because....it's...um, uh....  
  
Ansem: Shut the #&$^ up already.  
  
Riku: Ok, so...why did you become darkness itself?'  
  
Ansem: I saw an ad on TV...by the way, do you know, yellow is just not your color?  
  
Riku: *Eye twitches*  
  
Dingo: Yer all #&*(^#@)*!  
  
Sora: Bad Dingo.  
  
Riku: I'm going to make myself a sandwich.  
  
Sora: Okay!  
  
Ansem: Wait...Riku says o-k,' but you say o-k-a-y.' Which is the correct spelling?  
  
Sora: Ummmmm...erk?  
  
Ansem: That is...not correct! You forfit and I take all your money, loser!  
  
Sora:*Sniffle* Waaaaaaaah!  
  
Riku: Be quiet Ansem, everyone knows you have problems.  
  
Ansem: I confess! I want forgiveness! Forgive meeeeeeee!  
  
Riku: Ok...you have to hug your best friend, apologize, and give him all your money. Then promise never to do it again.  
  
Ansem: Best friend...hmmm... *Snatches Leon' as he walks by* *Hugs Leon'*  
  
Leon: Oh my god! I thought I explained this already! I am not gay! I am...am...It's Ansem!  
  
Riku: Are you a homophobe?!  
  
Leon': Noooooooo...but I am scared of Cloud.  
  
Cloud: Has anyone seen Sephiroth?  
  
Ansem: And Cloud! *Hugs Cloud*  
  
Cloud: Um, sorry, mister...but I will be true to my greatest love!  
  
Sephiroth: Don't call me Sephy-poo.  
  
Cloud: *Drags Sephiroth away*  
  
Sora: Hello, what happened to me!?  
  
Riku: And me!  
  
(I'm getting sick of calling him Leon...' we all know he's Squall, but since it is Kingdom Hearts...Leon it is) Leon: Let's have a game show.  
  
Ansem: Who wants to be a millionaire??  
  
Sora: bzzzzt Me!   
  
Ansem: That is correct! You win a million dollars!  
  
Sora: bzzzzt Yay!  
  
Riku: Well...that was...fun...  
  
Dingo: Ha ha, I chewed my way free! Now I can take this fanfic back!  
  
Leon: No opposable thumbs.  
  
Dingo: #*&$^(@!#  
  
Leon: *Gasp!*  
  
Ansem: Come on, Leon, let's blow this popsicle joint!  
  
Leon: Why do I feel the sudden urge to disco?  
  
Riku: *sleeping* Mmmm...what nice leather pants...  
  
Sora: Eeek! *wakes Riku*  
  
Riku: Hmmm wha?  
  
Sora: You were asleep!  
  
Riku: Have you ever considered buying...leather pants!?!?  
  
Sora: Umm...can we have a commercial break?  
  
*Ansem and Mickey Walk Onscreen*  
  
Ansem: Have you been shot?  
  
Mickey: Or otherwise seriously injured?  
  
Ansem: Well, here's Mickey The Hammer' Shapiro. Er...Mouse.   
  
Mickey: We'll sue for you.  
  
*Screen goes back to Sora, who is being tied to a chair by Dingo*  
  
Sora: No! NO! Saaaaaaaaave me!  
  
Dingo: Ha ha. @&#!*&^!!!  
  
Riku: *already tied up* Some commercial.  
  
Tarzan: Ugh. Ugga glug. Pug pug. Gum gum. Bum bug.  
  
Sora: Bum bug?  
  
Riku: *snorts*  
  
Dingo: *Wearing apron, cooking waffles* Yummy in my tummy.  
  
Sora: Why doesn't someone the #@$&@ save me?!  
  
Riku: Sora! There are children!  
  
Sora: *snidely* Don't fall asleep, Riku.  
  
Riku: *Blush*  
  
Dingo: Da tump ta tum dee doo, dump a da ta hara! La la la...  
  
Ansem: You know, I think chess is for the people who have big minds.  
  
Leon: Chess sucks.  
  
Sora: *gnaws on ropes*  
  
5 Minutes Pass  
  
Sora: *gnaws on ropes*  
  
Leon: Chess is for people with big minds.  
  
Ansem: Chess sucks.  
  
Dingo: Ok guys, I just can't let this go on. *Picks up Sora and Riku*  
*throws them out the window* Ha ha.  
  
Me: Way to go, Dingo! Untie me.   
  
Dingo: Oooh, Courage the Cowardly Dog is on! My favorite!  
  
Eustace: You stupid Dingo!  
  
Me: Un...tie...me?  
  
Dingo: Ha ha ha! That Courage is great!  
  
Me: Dingo? ...Dingo?  
  
*The lights turn off- we see my silhouette as the door closes.*  
  
Me: Waah.  



End file.
